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Were my feelings the result of some sort of self-fulfilling prophesy?

A ploy orchestrated by the most primitive and compulsive part of my consciousness – the Id as characterized by Sigmund Freud – to satisfy the most innate desires for sexual gratification, convincing my mind that the woman I saw before me had all of the characteristics that I was looking for?

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Ultimately, I have decided to implement a three-month abstinence policy – famously or infamously known as “the 90-day rule.” I will not become sexually involved with a member of the opposite sex until after at least three months of dating.

This means going on multiple dates, communicating on the phone and by text message fairly consistently, and spending time at each other’s homes without any sexual activity being initiated.

To me, if you REALLY like her, dating for 3 months is enough time for you to have the "exclusivity" or the "where do you see this going/are you looking for a relationship" talk if that's what you're looking for.

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Unfortunately, the risks within the Black community are substantially higher. The general consensus seems to be that one should see how things are going with that person before they decide when – or whether – they should become sexually involved. If the goal is to truly find a soulmate, then what’s the rush? As I reflect on my past dating experiences, I can say with relative certainty that I wasn’t always looking for these factors in the utmost earnestness. Are you becoming acquainted with the person relatively quickly? But, shouldn’t we be looking for these factors regardless?I just feel as if three months is enough time for two individuals to learn about one another and make an informed decision as to whether becoming intimate would be the best for both individuals.

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Now, I’m not saying that a relationship will fail miserably if a couple has sex after the first date or within the first month of dating because there are many examples that say contrary.

When I look back, we have defiantly shown progress as a couple.